There is a bully in every age and every time.
They come with the tide it seems,
They can never hide.
They reside in their smallness
And in their glee
That you won't really understand them.
They think it's funny the pain they bring
You can shake em,
You can hit em,
You can arrest em
But you will never understand the pain they bring
They may not say the same thing but they all mean the same thing
For this is their manifesto:
You don't deserve to breathe the same air that I breathe.
You don't deserve to have feelings because you are beneath me.
You are ugly and have no place in my little world.
You are brilliant and funny when you should be dull, talentless and stupid like me.
You think you are too good and too successful to be a real human being.
I shall make it known that I will drag you down.
I shall make you drown in silence.
You shall not be bold.
You will do what you are told.
You shall be of the hive.
How dare you strive to be different,
Different breaks our little minds.
Do not compute.
What can be done?
Do we bend for them and turn a blind eye,
Make excuses for them?
"Oh that's just how she is, she's just angry all the time."
"Oh he just likes how you react, so don't act like that okay?"
Sympathy for the bullies has run thin until we bring up elections,
Then it's not an infliction;
Just a bad habit.
I wrap myself in a blanket of depression,
Cursing the day I was born and all the bad that came after that.
Thinking about letting go,
Thinking about not to be,
Thinking about not being me,
It's an illness called self-bullying.
Thursday, April 28, 2016
Monday, June 30, 2014
Sitting at the gate wondering what I should do as the boredom escaltes. Perhaps I shouldnwrite or draw or even eat as one friend ssuggested. This could be the start of something great, I know but I can't help but to feel nervous. For it is my feet that will land in Paris, not my mother's or my father's.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Nothing to SEE
Hello, nothing interesting to look at nothing at all. In fact, you'll have better time watching strange videos on Youtube than here. THis is probably my last post as an 18 year old unless I post something about my mundane life...later. I'm not funny. I am not entertaining, keep moving along until something else hits your fancy. I'm as boring as it gets, except for being a writer, living with a bunch of people and animals, and occasional outbursts caused by the media like "WHY THE F*** DO TEABAGGERS HAVE A DEBATE!!!" but that's normal...so keep moving along, don't comment or whatever, keep going about your life as if nothing happened.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Into U.T. and G.P: a comparing summary
In the words of the professor of Futurama: "Good news, everyone," I have two comics: Ghost People (including Ghost People: Queens' Men, Ghost People: LOG and Ghost People: L.O.N.) and Upsidedown Town. Both U.T. and G.P. have a character who is distant and cold and even called the shocking word "asshole." However, Allan intends to be who he is and doesn't care what the hell people call him as long as he is able to do his job which is to manage his fellow officers, keep the peace of the three worlds of Earth, Zahayen and Black Ravensparrow, participate in the counsel of 12, and protect the three worlds. And maybe come back and sleep for four hours. Allan is also a solid five feet which pisses people off but it's an excuse...even though people forget he's so short.
Jacob is a natural misanthrope on the hunt of revenge of everyone who has ever made fun of him for being gay even if he was straight (or in reality bisexual but never admitted it and still won't) Jacob is of Irish origin and not afraid to show an accent unlike Allan who will only show an accent when he's angry. Furious. Jacob is more caring than most people expect and gets touchy when people offend other people. He hates being touched and has a sensitivity to the colors red or any color mixed with red until he wears his glasses or sunglasses and thus problem solved.
G.P has a character who balances Allan's anti-social misanthropic behaviour and he is Greffie or Greyford. Greffie is shorter than Allan by two or three inches, I keep going back and forth. Mancorn is also the same height as Greffie but that's a different summary. Greffie has this thing about fashion and thus forces his sister be fashionable but he reserves fushia or hot pink shorts with black suspenders with no shirt or shoes for himself. He nice, happy and pushes Allan to question the human race and to include himself in the human race.
In U.T., the Greffie character is Vince (or Vincent) he sometimes get swept up in the madness of his own life but breaks out once in a while to give Jacob a reality check while being completely unresponsible for anything in his life...he doesn't have a job but his own apartment which Jacob pays for. He's overly nice and sometimes overly confident. He's a horrible liar and bad at sarcasm or meanness around Rhia or Jacob but around Ben he's the devil or devil-like.
Both comics has strange characters who barely anyone can relate to and if you can relate to them, that just proves something, but I don't what.
Starrah (G.P.) and Rhia (U.T.)changes their hair constantly.
Starrah clubs and parties, Rhia is a nastier and female version of Allan and Jacob combined.
The Main character of Ghost People is Matt who is in the body of woman, born like that but he is a male.
Mancork's male body is hidden in a closet which he doesn't know about so at the moment he's in a female's body.
The STRANGER AND MORE UNRELATEABLE characters
Jen (U.T.) she grew up with Jacob but has not be able to relate to anyone but her wall who she gets daily advice from...and people say nothing to or about.
Dagan- Dagan is genderless, doesn't think gender is important and all the guys except some assume he is a he and all the girls except some think she is a she. In reality, I haven't a clue and the character won't tell me. Dagan also doesn't really talk in a normal way
For example: Person one: Hey you are dating my little girl
Person two (normal): No sir. (or) Do I look like I date girl? (or) Yes, um is that a problem? (or) Yes and what are you going to do about it?
Which Person 1 will give them an appropriate answer or just threaten them depending on the situation but Dagan...eh
Person One: Hey you are dating my daughter?
Dagan: If summers were as sweet to let peaches bloom before mere shrubs it would be a blessing but the berry falls after the flower and the measure of this is the sound of ticking numbers in a circle where happy he who is not affected by the ticking but alas it cannot be since the flower has been seen but never approached by the picking of a hand and when fall comes it blooms to a peach never picken but falls onto the ground and juices flow into the ground and the lonely berry is far from any such flower watches and envies the ground with the ablity to grow roots and make anew.
This long answer means "no, sir I am not dating your daughter because she prefers jocks." Pretty meataphor no? Any more abstract and I'll be writing th and e at the end of words. He does occasionally use thou, thyself and normal street talk but it's occasional.
Jacob is a natural misanthrope on the hunt of revenge of everyone who has ever made fun of him for being gay even if he was straight (or in reality bisexual but never admitted it and still won't) Jacob is of Irish origin and not afraid to show an accent unlike Allan who will only show an accent when he's angry. Furious. Jacob is more caring than most people expect and gets touchy when people offend other people. He hates being touched and has a sensitivity to the colors red or any color mixed with red until he wears his glasses or sunglasses and thus problem solved.
G.P has a character who balances Allan's anti-social misanthropic behaviour and he is Greffie or Greyford. Greffie is shorter than Allan by two or three inches, I keep going back and forth. Mancorn is also the same height as Greffie but that's a different summary. Greffie has this thing about fashion and thus forces his sister be fashionable but he reserves fushia or hot pink shorts with black suspenders with no shirt or shoes for himself. He nice, happy and pushes Allan to question the human race and to include himself in the human race.
In U.T., the Greffie character is Vince (or Vincent) he sometimes get swept up in the madness of his own life but breaks out once in a while to give Jacob a reality check while being completely unresponsible for anything in his life...he doesn't have a job but his own apartment which Jacob pays for. He's overly nice and sometimes overly confident. He's a horrible liar and bad at sarcasm or meanness around Rhia or Jacob but around Ben he's the devil or devil-like.
Both comics has strange characters who barely anyone can relate to and if you can relate to them, that just proves something, but I don't what.
Starrah (G.P.) and Rhia (U.T.)changes their hair constantly.
Starrah clubs and parties, Rhia is a nastier and female version of Allan and Jacob combined.
The Main character of Ghost People is Matt who is in the body of woman, born like that but he is a male.
Mancork's male body is hidden in a closet which he doesn't know about so at the moment he's in a female's body.
The STRANGER AND MORE UNRELATEABLE characters
Jen (U.T.) she grew up with Jacob but has not be able to relate to anyone but her wall who she gets daily advice from...and people say nothing to or about.
Dagan- Dagan is genderless, doesn't think gender is important and all the guys except some assume he is a he and all the girls except some think she is a she. In reality, I haven't a clue and the character won't tell me. Dagan also doesn't really talk in a normal way
For example: Person one: Hey you are dating my little girl
Person two (normal): No sir. (or) Do I look like I date girl? (or) Yes, um is that a problem? (or) Yes and what are you going to do about it?
Which Person 1 will give them an appropriate answer or just threaten them depending on the situation but Dagan...eh
Person One: Hey you are dating my daughter?
Dagan: If summers were as sweet to let peaches bloom before mere shrubs it would be a blessing but the berry falls after the flower and the measure of this is the sound of ticking numbers in a circle where happy he who is not affected by the ticking but alas it cannot be since the flower has been seen but never approached by the picking of a hand and when fall comes it blooms to a peach never picken but falls onto the ground and juices flow into the ground and the lonely berry is far from any such flower watches and envies the ground with the ablity to grow roots and make anew.
This long answer means "no, sir I am not dating your daughter because she prefers jocks." Pretty meataphor no? Any more abstract and I'll be writing th and e at the end of words. He does occasionally use thou, thyself and normal street talk but it's occasional.
Dresses to Fashion
Francois Sagan said "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." My mother said it was true. Dresses on project runway are interesting to look at but the other clothes considered to be fashion or not fashion. Why is fashion important? It's become like a mating tool, we used looked at the body or smells and now we want a great presentation too. It's a bit much, maybe, possibly? Well I don't care. I'll dress well and in my way and I'll dress bad and pretend not to care when I actually pretending to care enough to pretend not to care. I ask you if anything makes sense. But maybe I'm just trying to examine every inch of my life all the time.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
October UPDATE
Days go on. We were going to down Belle, 16, feline but a good doctor fell in love with her and took her in. I wish I could've met her. I miss her dearly. Anyway, I'm worried about my grandmother but there's nothing I can do about it. In summary being 18 is like being 17 only you are considered an adult by the country. It sucks.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Why I like Fiction or Why I think Truth doesn't Exist
Give me the time for advice, give me the trust to talk. I sat on a bench, waiting for journalism to start when I wrote a reflection that makes some sense, but since it's my logic it makes no sense so bear with me. If you disagree with me, don't make it public. If you do, please comment.
I think. I think and mold my thoughts. Unsure bullshit is exactly what I think. Every word has a sting but humor can turn the sting into puns and metaphors will hide the sting, while talking in the third person gets rid of it almost entirely. I don't use humor in my writing for that is not what I aim for. I aim for a story to be told, so if anything is funny: it is accidental, purely.
I have problems. Why would anyone want to talk to me? Why would anyone stop me in the street to talk to me? Who cares about my problems? No one. Oh sure, one can pretend to care but you don't and I would never suspect anyone to. I am one out what 3-4 billion on a small rock, floating around a small star, in a small galaxy which is one out of trillions. Nothing we do is really pointless, which is why we must make our passions and stories and lives have a point. Our mere disagreements, our wars, our conflicts, our joy, our honor, our treaties are completely worthless, but yet we do it anyway. Our beliefs are not as important as we think. I question a great being randomly choosing one rock with enough people for two planets, yes I think we are over populating and it's never going to end...ever.
Many of us dream that shall be some alien planet like ours to supply us, so we can keep Earth's life on that planet. However, I do not think that we deserve another planet considering we treating ours like trash and expect it to magically rejuvenate, after taking and killing the young. Right...whatever. We act like we don't care about the past or the future. Ah, the past. The past is riddled with humans constantly forgetting the past as generations. Individuals, well I'm going to quote a character on Covert Affairs, the character,'Auggie' said, "Every step forward begins with a firmly planted foot in the past." But we forget history without a single hestination and that is why we do it all over again, thank you politics.
Do you know the problem with the spoken word? It's not recorded. Sure, we can record it or even write down every single thing we said but we won't and cannot. So the words that are never said shall go on in our heads until we forget, that is. Even if one records a speech, can one guarantee that speech wasn't edited beforehand? And if we record a speech, what is that purpose? The purpose is to take what we want others to hear and aim it at our audience to sway and woo them to our side, to our own biased opinion.
Every piece of news is edited and is biased, no matter how objective the journalist tries to be. No fact or opinion is objective because it is made by humans. Facts like the definition of "planet" constantly change. Therefore both opinion and fact is not reliable, nothing said can be relied on. Objectiveness and perfection are merely goals, goals that are impossible to reach. (Objective, subjective, perfection, normal, plausible, impossible, merely, extremely are all words for opinions.) If there are no facts, that would mean our endless search for truth cannot be reached. If truth does not exist in this galaxy or universe, I'll stick to fiction and fantasy because unlike nonfiction, they do not proclaim to be opinions or facts, they are only dreams. I'll continue to use puns, metaphors, and third person in my speech. If truth doesn't exist, then what does and what becomes of trust? I am sorry but I have no answers to those questions and I'll bet there are few who do. I ask only that you ponder this and I thank you for not tuning out, or leaving or skipping to the next blog.
I think. I think and mold my thoughts. Unsure bullshit is exactly what I think. Every word has a sting but humor can turn the sting into puns and metaphors will hide the sting, while talking in the third person gets rid of it almost entirely. I don't use humor in my writing for that is not what I aim for. I aim for a story to be told, so if anything is funny: it is accidental, purely.
I have problems. Why would anyone want to talk to me? Why would anyone stop me in the street to talk to me? Who cares about my problems? No one. Oh sure, one can pretend to care but you don't and I would never suspect anyone to. I am one out what 3-4 billion on a small rock, floating around a small star, in a small galaxy which is one out of trillions. Nothing we do is really pointless, which is why we must make our passions and stories and lives have a point. Our mere disagreements, our wars, our conflicts, our joy, our honor, our treaties are completely worthless, but yet we do it anyway. Our beliefs are not as important as we think. I question a great being randomly choosing one rock with enough people for two planets, yes I think we are over populating and it's never going to end...ever.
Many of us dream that shall be some alien planet like ours to supply us, so we can keep Earth's life on that planet. However, I do not think that we deserve another planet considering we treating ours like trash and expect it to magically rejuvenate, after taking and killing the young. Right...whatever. We act like we don't care about the past or the future. Ah, the past. The past is riddled with humans constantly forgetting the past as generations. Individuals, well I'm going to quote a character on Covert Affairs, the character,'Auggie' said, "Every step forward begins with a firmly planted foot in the past." But we forget history without a single hestination and that is why we do it all over again, thank you politics.
Do you know the problem with the spoken word? It's not recorded. Sure, we can record it or even write down every single thing we said but we won't and cannot. So the words that are never said shall go on in our heads until we forget, that is. Even if one records a speech, can one guarantee that speech wasn't edited beforehand? And if we record a speech, what is that purpose? The purpose is to take what we want others to hear and aim it at our audience to sway and woo them to our side, to our own biased opinion.
Every piece of news is edited and is biased, no matter how objective the journalist tries to be. No fact or opinion is objective because it is made by humans. Facts like the definition of "planet" constantly change. Therefore both opinion and fact is not reliable, nothing said can be relied on. Objectiveness and perfection are merely goals, goals that are impossible to reach. (Objective, subjective, perfection, normal, plausible, impossible, merely, extremely are all words for opinions.) If there are no facts, that would mean our endless search for truth cannot be reached. If truth does not exist in this galaxy or universe, I'll stick to fiction and fantasy because unlike nonfiction, they do not proclaim to be opinions or facts, they are only dreams. I'll continue to use puns, metaphors, and third person in my speech. If truth doesn't exist, then what does and what becomes of trust? I am sorry but I have no answers to those questions and I'll bet there are few who do. I ask only that you ponder this and I thank you for not tuning out, or leaving or skipping to the next blog.
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